Fnord Incorporated

Spam.. or is it?

in the support email folder at my work today, we received a bizarre email that looked like spam. we deleted it and thought nothing of it for about it. this is nothing new, we get spam all the time. turns out, it was spam.. but it was not spam.. but it was… it was… someone getting caught in the act of spamming?

i changed the company name and edited their names so that they can keep their privacy though i cannot edit other sites… that make this all the more ironic. if you really want to know who they are (why again?) it should be fairly easy to figure out.

Just for reference, according to Entrepreneur of the Industry

“Danny […] won the first ever BPMA Entrepreneur of the Industry Award for the UK’s promotional marketing industry ”

apparently he is also kinda a dick to his employees when they make mistakes… we know this how? cause he spammed us back with his reply to our initial spam…

Well, there’s egg and bacon,
egg sausage and bacon
Egg and spam
Egg, bacon and spam
Egg, bacon, sausage and spam
Spam, bacon, sausage and spam
Spam, egg, spam, spam, bacon and spam
1st email

From: Chris E***
Sent: 25 March 2008 14:44
To: support
Cc: Danny B****
Subject: Crazee Thingz at crazee price’s

Dear Sir / Madam

My name is Chris E*** and I work for a company called Asylum Puzzles / Wackee Thingz and I feel that 1 of our products is perfect corporate gift for your business. The Chrome Asylum cube is a 13 puzzle, which has 19 186 solutions and I believe is just what [my company] needs. We thought that you may like an electronic version of our new UK Wackee Catalogue (please see attached) and hope that we can provide you with some Crazee Thingz at Crazee Prices.

We look forward to doing some business with you in 2008 and beyond.
If i can be of any further assistance, please contact me on 0845 230 ****.
With kindest regards

Chris E***
Sales Executive
Asylum Puzzles Ltd

ow.. what sucky spam.. they contacted us to sell us corporate gifts.. well, spam is spam.. but here is the best part.. APPARENTLY, Danny is Chris’s boss. read on:

2nd email

From: Danny B***
Sent: Tuesday, March 25, 2008 8:11 AM
To: Chris E***; Support
Subject: RE: Crazee Thingz at crazee price’s

Chris

please be careful and re-read your emails back to yourself before sending
Last few emails have all had the line “The Chrome Asylum cube is a 13 puzzle, which has 19 186 solutions and I believe is just what Chrome needs.”

13 puzzle? Doesn’t make sense - do you mean “The Asylum Cube is a 13 piece, 3-D puzzle which has 19,186 different solutions?”
Also, like this email below - you are promoting 2 companies - at once… which isn’t ideal - as you think the chrome fits for this then fine…?

Are you following ANY of these hundreds of emails with phone calls - and have you had ANY replies from ANY of them…
I’d much prefer you try and do some ‘phone’ selling - as email doesn’t seem to be working…

D

well good job Danny.. thanks for letting us know that this was spam… we appreciate you filling our mailbox with information that we do not need.

Our reply was sent to advise them that they need not send us further solicitations for business.

3rd email

From: Support
Sent: Tuesday, March 25, 2008 4:03 PM
To: Danny B***; Chris E***
Subject: RE: Crazee Thingz at crazee price’s

Danny:

Please consider removing Carbon Copied “prospective customers” from your emails before laying into your employees about their email habits. It makes you look foolish as well as shows us that we have just been purposefully spammed.

And consider laying off Chris, he is just doing the “job” you hired him to do.

Jason
Client Support

unfortunately, it was not until after sending the email that i realized the phrase “laying off” could be mean firing, or not being a dick towards… sorry if you lose your job Chris, i meant the lesser not being a dick to you bit.. spamming sucks eh?

Spam, sausage, spam, spam, spam, bacon, spam tomato and spam

Spam, spam, spam, egg and spam
Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, spam and spam.

Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Lovely Spam! Lovely Spam!